Michael Horgan and Edward Balmelli
In the ten years since Massachusetts staked its first-in-the-nation claim, 17 other states (plus the District of Columbia) have legalized same-sex marriage. Some victories came through the legislature, others through the courts, and some via popular vote. But in the fight for equal rights, one common denominator has existed across state lines: an approach that Mike Horgan and Ed Balmelli believe is a result of the Goodridge legacy.
âIt put a human face to the issue,â says Mike of the way GLAD approached the case. âItâs easy to hate gay marriage in the abstract. Itâs a lot harder to hate Ed and Mike.â
Ed and Mike have loved each other since 1994. In 2000 they received a civil union in Vermont, but soon involved themselves as plaintiffs in the Goodridge case, prompted in part by the sad and horrifying experience of a friend who wasnât even allowed to authorize a coroner to act when his longtime partner died in their home. Suddenly, a civil union and precautionary paperwork didnât seem like enough.
âHow is there such a thing as a halfway point in equality?â muses Mike. âBack then Massachusetts was further ahead than the rest of the country. So maybe there would be some setbacks. Maybe it would be three steps forward and one step back. But it was time to really go for marriage. Half measures and incremental steps wouldnât have worked here.â
They didnât have to. By sharing their story and humanizing their struggles, they helped make historyâand offered a template for future approaches. âWe were seven couples from all different demographics, telling our stories over and over again,â says Ed. âPeople got to see gay men and women who were just like their brothers, sisters and neighbors. They didnât just see us as gay people, they saw us as human beings.â
But the rest of country is still a patchwork of inequality, a reality that the couple has had to confront in the years since. About a year ago, Ed, who works as an information technology professional, saw his job moved to an office in Texas. âMy VP asked me if I would consider going to Texas,â says Ed, who declined. âHe asked me why, and I said, âBecause if I went to Texas, I wouldnât be married anymore.ââ
At least now, thanks to the progress that has been made, it was a seamless process to go on Mikeâs benefits while he works as a contractor. And one day, the couple knows, equal marriage wonât make a state exceptional: it will be the law of the land. âMy niece is in law school, and they were studying the Goodridge case in her constitutional law class,â says Ed proudly.
Though for a couple that made history by sharing a glimpse of their life, sometimes the most telling signs of progress arenât found in legal case studies, but in small, personal moments. âEight years ago, a plumber coming to the house would ask, âWhoâs going to be there?â Iâd say my husband, and wait for a reaction,â says Ed. âNow everyone just says, âOh, whatâs his name? How long have you been together?ââ
For the record, theyâre Ed and Mike. Theyâve been together twenty years. And you still canât help but love them.